It is written by Mod Paupersen and is dated 1 April 2010.
NOTE - By now, you will all know that this blog is an April Fools' joke! You may have also figured out that mod_paupersen (anagram of 'made-up person') isn't quite real. Still, we hope we haven't disappointed you, and that you enjoyed the day. And if you missed out, why not read on to see what the fuss was about?
Hopefully you have all read the newspost and converted the words into sheer joy! With any luck, you are as excited as I am - after all, I have spent five years skulking in the shadows, working like a wasp to design and build a theme park without any of its millions of players knowing!
Obviously , we didn’t keep it secret enough, and things leaked all over the internet. As has been mentioned elsewhere, a RuneScape fansite found Google Map images showing construction near our UK office; Mod MMG changed his display name to ThemePark2010; and long-time RuneScape player GreasySpaniel even found my CV on a Swedish recruitment site, listing my work on Fort Hasselhoff in Germany, and Brassic Park in Finland. It is certainly unusual for Jagex employee to have two theme parks on their CV!
That doesn’t make this a damp squid: far from it, in fact. This is the first time we have been able to show you the rides we have planned, and we can measure the percentage of 'woots' and ascii on the forums. I can only encourage you to vote in the poll on the front page of the RuneScape to register your interest and let us know some vital information. With any luck, your votes can be turned into rides and cash.
Although we are all champagne and cabbage soup, there have been moments in the park’s construction that did not go so dandy. For one, Excl and friends were invited to an early viewing of the park, but were left stranded outside of the Pirates of Mos Le'Harmless paddock as storms battered their tourboat! We thought that zombies couldn’t get past electric fences, but un-life always finds a way. Clever zombies!
But that is rummaging in the cellar of the past, and all guests now get a 'funpack', with overnight bag and cattleprod. Having met most of our safety requirements, we have been given a green light by the UK Parks Commission and are ready to open at the end of this year. You will all get your chance to flume down Baxtorian Falls, experience the world of the Chaos Elemental in 13 separate dimensions, and even change your sister into a brother at the Makeover Mage Facepaint Stall!
We hope we’ve created something for every age, and for every experience level, so pester your mum, dad, partner or physician for permission to come and visit the park in the 5th Quarter of 2010. I can almost smell your faces as you emerge from the Ape Paytoll's nostrils and see Funbridge for the first time.
I see you,
Wet ‘n’ Wildy Project Coordinator
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